“We can smile, breathe, walk, and eat our meals in a way that allows us to be in touch with the abundance of happiness that is available. We are very good at preparing to live, but not very good at living. We know how to sacrifice ten years for a diploma and we are willing to work very hard to get a job, a car, a house, and so on. But we have difficulty remembering that we are alive in the present moment, the only moment there is for us to be alive.”—Thich Nhat Hanh, Peace is Every Step (via sweetannasour)
“Unhappy memories are persistent. They’re specific, and it’s the details that refuse to leave us alone. Though a happy memory may stay with you just as long as one that makes you miserable, what you remember softens over time. What you recall is simply that you were happy, not necessarily the individual moments that brought about your joy. But the memory of something painful does just the opposite. It retains its original shape, all bony fingers and pointy elbows. Every time it returns, you get a quick poke in the eye or jab in the stomach. The memory of being unhappy has the power to hurt us long after the fact. We feel the injury anew each and every time we think of it.”—Cameron Dokey (via danseurs)
“Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.”—Franz Kafka (via misswallflower)
Because I've had conversations about this with a few people in recent days
There are as many ways of being sexual as there are people on this planet. However you feel about your sexuality is not wrong, and it’s no one’s business to tell you that it is any more than it is your business to tell them theirs.
Do not measure your sexuality against anyone else’s yardstick. Feeling like you have to conform to anyone else’s ideals or attitudes is a guaranteed way to be insecure, uncomfortable, and unsatisfied. You deserve better than all of that.
You shouldn’t feel ashamed of your sexuality, but you shouldn’t feel pressured to share more of it than you’re comfortable with or ready for. Your sexuality is yours and yours alone and only you have any right to say how it should be handled.
Sexuality can be very fluid, and what you think you are today could easily change tomorrow. Don’t judge yourself if you think this is happening.
By the same token, don’t let anyone else tell you that ‘it’s just a phase,’ or ‘you’ll grow out of it.’ Again - it is yours and yours alone, and fuck anyone who tries to tell you differently. (Er…metaphorically speaking, of course.)
Being sex-positive includes supporting the rights and choices of everyone on the sexual spectrum - including those who choose to have more and less than you do.
Sex and love are different things. It can be wonderful when they overlap, but don’t feel like either one is somehow lessened for not having the other.
Only you can know what you’re ready for or comfortable with. Good rule of thumb? If you aren’t sure, the answer is probably no.
Sex is communication. It’s a way of connecting to another person, and finding a partner who “speaks your language” can be one of the best experiences ever. Whether it’s a quick exchange that fills a moment or a long, drawn out discussion, it always has the possibility of bringing new insights and awareness - just like any conversation.
Sex is also a journey. Don’t be in such a rush to reach a finish line that you ignore all the things to try and explore along the way. On a similar note, don’t think that just because you reached that line once, you can’t go back to an earlier point. Don’t listen to people who tell you you can’t go back to holding hands - if you want to, you can.
“The first act of violence that patriarchy demands of males is not violence toward women. Instead patriarchy demands of all males that they engage in acts of psychic self-mutilation, that they kill off the emotional parts of themselves. If an individual is not successful in emotionally crippling himself, he can count on patriarchal men to enact rituals of power that will assault his self-esteem.”—
“Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put back together unless and until all living humans read the book.”—John Green, The Fault in Our Stars (via danseurs)